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Friday, April 29, 2016

Find Your Place to Refresh

Are you in a dry place in your life? Do you feel like you can not access the fruit of your efforts. Have you emptied your cup for the saucer experience? If this is where you find yourself then come here and sit with me for a while and I will attempt to help you. My love once taught me that help is only help when it is perceived as such otherwise it is interference. I hope that if you have read this far I am not interfering but I am going to get a little in your business.
Here are five of the places that dry us out.
1.      Negative relationships
2.     Dwelling on past failures and disappointments
3.     Wanting more for people than they want for themselves
4.     Dying with the lie
5.     Involuntary Surrender
One  two and three are pretty self explanatory and if you have ever sought to better yourself then you know these relationships and habits are hard to break but worth the effort. It is draining to let anyone speak into your life things that do not edify it. You can’t be okay with the relationship that doesn’t feed you plain and simple. I will starve before I eat molded bread. More people will always come, you can make new friends and that man is replaceable beyond your hurt feelings and a few lonely nights protect your prosperity by removing these types of people.  We all make mistakes and living in those moments divert you attention from current opportunities and leave you seeing life in the rearview experiencing loss and sadness.  Go get your life back. Release the past, I have a process that I follow for disappointments. It is available on my website. (link the word website) And number three is about family. Your family are the people that you can not get rid of even if you do not have them in your life on a daily basis they are still your blood. For these types of draining relationships you have to do work of loving people where they are. If you don’t want a college degree then okay Im sorry that is your choice but as a result you have this amount of time to get out of my house and you can expect this much and type of help from me going forward. Finish with “Don’t believe me just watch this moving company come in box your things and leave them at the edge of the driveway. I love you.”
Now for the reasons that ignited the need for this blog. Number 4 – Dying with the Lie. I would often accuse my love of being a cheater and I was right he was and is. The reality of that was that I did not mind the cheating as much as I despised being lied to. I hated knowing and not being able to talk about it, not getting the details so I could move on with my life. Now that is odd and doesn’t relate to most people but the point is I had to live with his lies that he would swear by even in the face of proof that he had lied. Living in a place that wasn’t true to who I am made me sick with myself and as a result I was draining my cup. Prior to that growing up in a terrible parenting situation trying to call the man that I look like my father when he had never been an active part of my life. Saying the words mother to a woman that had tried since birth to kill me physically and emotionally since birth felt like a lie I could not live with as result I started referring to them by name and felt immediately better. They were not my parents they were the vessels that would bring me to my real parents. Lying to myself that they were more than that was draining my cup. You get the picture? Something in your life is a lie, honor yourself with the truth and let the lie die.
Number 5 – Involuntary Surrender.  I have often found myself caught up in situations that I had no idea how I had gotten into the mess or how I would get out. More often than we realize we surrender to people to situations to responsibilities that we have no capacity to take on. I have learned to honor my gifts by only doing what serves them. Only attending events that feed my purpose and if it doesn’t and I happen to go I don’t stay long. I make it my business to be present in my life to show up for myself and to ask myself what the yes will cost me.  What is the yes costing you that you have not accounted for?

I said all of this to say that after every tough time after all of the energy depletion and disappointment you must seek to be refreshed. I love the beach and going there revives me, but when I can’t get there I clean my house and have a staycation in which I rest, pray, read, write, sleep, plan, eat well, and binge watch television. I cut-off my cellphone and only take house phone calls. Yes I have a house phone, are you judging me? I have child a business and a job.
So in closing find your happy place by resting in the power of God and self. Re-enter your life refreshed and protect the power and resources that you have stored in your cup. God will add increase for the saucer, but he has to have something to increase. It is not magic, while I do believe in magic, I am convinced that growth and prosperity are achieved by an increase to effort. I can’t expect to win blogging awards if I don’t write blogs. I cant expect to have bestsellers if Idont market the books I write. I do the work God gives the increase. You do the work and as sure as he promised it God will give the increase.

I love you